Tag Archives: Coming to America

When Life Happens

 

 

Life Quote
 

When Life Happens

By: Ronke Alao

Are you one of those people that makes plans of what  to do and when to do it? I'm that kind of person. I think a large group of women are that way especially during the teen-age years. I remember having a timeline of when I wanted to be married, when I wanted to have kids and when I wanted to be done having kids. Yes I had it all mapped out.

I was going to be married at the age of 25 and be done having kids by the time I was 30 years old. It was also part of the plan that I would have had 3kids by that age too. My first born would be a girl and then a boy would come second. The youngest child would be another girl. Oh, did I mention too that I was supposed to get a Masters degree in Human Nutrition somewhere in between? 

Call it day-dreaming or plain crazy, I had these thoughts (or plans) as early as age 19. The future was all set; I just had to play my part.

So how far gone am I in my 'plan'? Let's just say I didn't get married at 25, I don't have a Masters degree and I'm just a little over a couple of years shy of age 30 without kids yet. I also planned to live with my husband full time for the first year of marriage but our first year of marriage was long distance, it still is. Talk about major shift in plans! Do you (or did you) have similar plans of how things were supposed to play out in your life too?. Maybe you didn't have plans similar to mine but you look at how your life has played out so far and it wasn't exactly what you would have hoped for. What do you do?

For me, so many things have happened between then and now that I never envisaged. That's what they call life I guess, but even when I look back, I really have no regrets. Sure, there are times when we might feel things might have been better if they worked out just the way we planned it but who knows for sure? 

We tend to look at things that didn't go according to plan in our lives and mourn them but we forget to look at things we didn't plan but worked well to our benefit.

 In my own experience, I can look back and wonder how things might have been different if it all went according to my plan but again I know I might have turned out a different person. There's no doubt that I might have had different friends, met different people and might be a different person. Looking at the woman I have become , I am so glad that God who fashioned my life didn't have to follow my own plan. He had something better in mind.

You're probably thinking, "Ronke, that's all nice and good for you but I can't make sense of where I'm at now". Trust me; it will all make sense someday. Just continue to give it your best to be a better person. Make the best of what is right in front of you. Maybe you had dreams of soaring in your career and things seem to be moving slowly. Don't throw HOPE out. There is a greater purpose to the path that your life is on and it will work to your good eventually. We can only see the present but if only we saw the future, how exciting would that be! The problem with knowing the future in its totality is that it robs us of  the drive and passion that we need to live today to its fullest.

When life happens to you, when the boyfriend doesn't come through, when that college degree isn't what you thought it would be, when motherhood isn't living up to the picture you had in your mind and you look back and really want to say "It wasn't worth it", hold on. Hold on still.

Yes, it is true that life does happen. Taking what life hands us and learning to make the most of it is what enriches our lives.

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In what area would you say life has really happened to you and what has given you the courage and strength to keep pushing for the best? Leave us a comment below, you never know whom you might encourage!

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  Ronke Alao  left her family and fiance behind to relocate  to the United States from Nigeria.  She  faced the challenges of dealing with a long distance relationship. Having being through moments of uncertainty and doubt, she is able to bring compassion and understanding to the table when she speaks to others.Ronke is happily married to the man of her dreams. Her passion is to help women have better relationships with their spouse and others so they can live a fulfilling and rich life. Download her recently  released free E-book- Embracing The Real You.

 

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